People who are Gay or Lesbian are attracted to people the Same sex as themselves

Gay men are attracted to other men

Lesbians or 'gay women'  are attracted to other women

Society seems to expect people to be Heterosexual despite the fact that statistically 5-10 people in 100 will be gay, lesbian or Bisexual. That means there are probably half a million gay, lesbian and bisexual people living in Scotland.

Despite this there are strong messages of disapproval that we pick up about being gay or lesbian from a very young age. This means that for most gay and lesbian people there may be a long time between realising you are gay to actually telling anyone else about it or doing anything about it.

When someone who is gay tells another person their sexuality it is known as “Coming out”. Many people don’t come out because they are scared that they will be rejected by friends and family or lose their job. Sadly for some people this can actually be true. For some, this fear is so intense that they pretend to lead heterosexual lives well into adulthood and might even get married and have children to cover up that they are gay.

People who are gay can grow up with a sense of low Self esteem and low expectations of what they are entitled to. The good news is that society is starting to change and be more welcoming of people who are gay and lesbian. For example, gay couples can enter into a civil partnership, which entitles them to the same rights as a married couple.

Many people who do come out report a great sense of relief and a feeling of how great it is to be honest about who they are.

People who have come out often find it much easier to meet partners and enter into relationships. They might start to use the gay scene which is usually made up of pubs and clubs as a place to meet other gay people. There are also support groups available to help people come to terms with their identity or with coming out.

If you are not gay the important thing is to remember not to assume that everyone you know is heterosexual and to think about how you might support a friend or family member if they told you they were gay.